Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Burn One Down

Does the 2010 Olympic torch look like a joint?

Oh, right. The Winter Olympics are being held in Vancouver next year.  

Now it makes perfect sense

I'll refrain from making jokes about the Jamaican Bobsled Team's excitement about attending the upcoming games. Oops, too late...

Monday, May 18, 2009

I'll Take Two, Please

Beauty may be in the eye of the beholder, but history has shown that true beauty comes from the artistry and vision of Italian hands and minds.

Am I biased?

Perhaps.

But you can't argue against the contributions Italians have made to the fields of art, architecture and design over the centuries.

Look above at the 1957 Ferrari 250 Testa Rossa for some recent proof. It's a stunning piece of machinery, the apex of form and function. And now, this particular model also has the distinction of being the most expensive car sold at auction after pulling in $12,156,252 over the weekend at Sotheby's.

Only 21 of these beauties are left on the planet and they seldomly go up for auction, making this weekend's sale newsworthy.

Here's the official release:
MARANELLO, Italy, May 17 /PRNewswire/ — RM Auctions, in association with Sotheby's made history at the Ferrari factory in Maranello today as a 1957 Ferrari 250 TR, chassis no. 0714TR sold for € 9,020,000 at the third-annual Ferrari Leggenda e Passione event to set a new world record for the most expensive motor car ever to be sold at auction.

Returning to its Maranello birthplace for its auction debut, the euro 9,020,000 sale price represents euro 1,980,000 more than the previous auction world record which was set at the same sale last year.

"The historical significance of this car attracted a bidding war as collectors from around the world - both in the room and on the telephone - competed to secure one of the most alluring and iconic of all Ferrari racing cars," said Max Girardo, Managing Director of RM Europe."The eyes of the world were watching today's sale as cars of this quality are so rarely offered to the market. The rarity and the provenance of the Testa Rossa speaks for itself and the price we achieved today is testament to that. We are delighted with the result the car achieved today," he added.

1957 Ferrari 250 TR

300 bhp at 7,200 rpm, 2,953 cc single overhead cam 60? Type 128 LM V-12 engine, six Weber 38 DCN carburettors, four-speed manual gearbox, unequal A-arms, coil springs, Houdaille hydraulic shock absorbers and anti roll bar front suspension, live axle, semi elliptic leaf springs, Houdaille shock absorbers with four trailing arms rear suspension, four-wheel drum brakes. Wheelbase: 2,350 mm (92.5 in.)

"The result of a race is 50 percent due to the car. When the car has been made, you are only half way there. You now have to find a driver and it costs more to train a good racing driver than it does to make a car. When I decide to take part in a race, I don't think about my competitors. I try to do my best, without telling myself ‘I must beat Mercedes or Maserati'. For me the importance of a race is the technical result, that is, whether – given the same course and the same atmospheric conditions – established records have been broken. If so, progress has been made."

Enzo Ferrari's telling insight on his views of motor racing.In 1957 the Commissione Sportiva Internationale (CSI) had been contemplating new rules to make sports car racing safer after the disaster at Le Mans in 1955 and Alfonso de Portago's crash in the 1957 Mille Miglia, in which he and his co-driver, along with nine spectators were killed. Despite this appalling accident, Ferrari went on to take The Sports Car Championship at the final round at Caracas. The team had begun the year with the 3.8-litre 315 S, which was later developed into the 4.0-litre 335 S. Ferrari's mind was already on his next creation – which would be one of his finest.

Anticipating a reduction in capacity for sports cars by the CSI for the 1958 season, Ferrari began working on a car powered by the 2,953 cc, 250 GT, V-12 engine. Ferrari first used the name Testarossa on the four-cylinder 500 TR. The name "red head" was used because the car's cam covers were painted red. The new V-12 car, developed under Carlo Chiti's engineering team, was intended by Enzo Ferrari as a more powerful version of the four-cylinder car retaining similar handling characteristics and tremendous reliability. This robustness had been proven on the 250 GT unit with a single overhead camshaft. Chiti revised the cylinder head design, fitted high compression pistons, special conrods and six Weber twin choke carburettors.

The first prototype, chassis number 0666, fitted with an envelope body similar to the 290 MM, appeared at the Nürburgring in 1957 and was tried by all the Ferrari works drivers. Olivier Gendebien set the sixth fastest time, no small feat against the more powerful Aston Martins and sister Ferrari team cars. The car finished a disappointing tenth, driven by Masten Gregory and Olindo Morolli who was given the drive at the last minute and was somewhat out of his depth.

The second Testarossa prototype, chassis number 0704, was bodied by Scaglietti and caused a sensation when it appeared at Le Mans. With its distinctive pontoon fenders, the car was said to be one of Scaglietti's very favourite designs. Ferrari's coach building artisan explained, "Formula 1 was the inspiration for the shape, there were pods on the sides of the F1 cars, (Ferrari Lancia D50) and while I wouldn't call them aerodynamic, they went well. We used a similar idea by designing the body to bring air in towards the brakes to cool them. In many ways the Ferrari 250 Testarossa was a Formula 1 car with fenders."

At Le Mans in June 1957 both prototypes suffered problems with new pistons. 0666 failed to start and 0704 retired, having run as high as second place. In Venezuela, during the final round of the championship, its potential was finally proven. Wolfgang von Trips and Wolfgang Seidel finished third in 0666 with Maurice Trintignant and Gendebien in fourth with 0704.1958 would prove to be the 250 Testarossa's absolute pinnacle. The factory cars won four of the six races to secure Ferrari's third consecutive World Sports Car Championship for Constructors. Phil Hill and Peter Collins won in Argentina and again at the Sebring 12-Hours. Victory at the Targa Florio was taken by Luigi Musso and Gendebien and the 24 Hours of Le Mans was won by Gendebien and Hill.

For 1959 the Testarossa's bodywork was redesigned by Pinin Farina and built by Fantuzzi, Scaglietti having been sidelined by the increased output of Ferrari road cars. While the TR59 of Dan Gurney, Chuck Daigh, Hill and Gendebien took victory at Sebring in March there were to be no further wins and Ferrari finished second to Aston Martin in the Championship.

In 1960 Testarossas won at Argentina (Hill/Gendebien) and Le Mans (Gendebien/Paul Frere) and took the Championship once again. Although the 330 TRI/LM would win at Le Mans in 1962 with Hill and Gendebien, 1961 was really the car's swansong as a works entered car. Hill and Gendebien won at Sebring and Le Mans and Lorenzo Bandini and Giorgio Scarlatti won at Pescaro in the TR61 prototype.

Only 34 250 Testarossas were ever built, although this figure is debatable, as it also includes both prototypes as well as the 330 TRI/LM. Some were manufactured purely as customer cars. Many of these would continue racing for years to come, often with great success in national and international competition.The car presented here, 0714, is the fourth Ferrari 250 Testarossa built and the second customer car. Finished in white, it was sold new to Piero Drogo who was then living in Modena. Although born in Vignale Monferrato, a small town near Alessandria in Piedmont, the Drogo family emigrated to Venezuela. Drogo raced extensively on the South American continent in sports cars and saloons. He finished seventh in the 1956 Venezuelan Grand Prix and later returned to Italy where he worked as a mechanic for Stanguellini in Modena. In 1960 he drove a Cooper Climax in the Italian Grand Prix at Monza, finishing eighth. In the early sixties he started Carrozzeria Sports Cars. They produced bodies for the stunning P3 and P4 Ferraris and the square-backed car which became affectionately known as the "Breadvan".

Ferrari 250 Testarossa chassis number 0714 was immediately modified by Drogo after he bought it. He added air scoops underneath the doors to help cool the rear brakes. His first race in the car was the 1958 1000 Kilometres at Buenos Aires, Argentina. The car was shipped to South America along with a factory car, ready for competition. Drogo had a trouble-free race in 0714 finishing a highly credible fourth overall with co-driver Sergio Gonzalez. Drogo's next race in this TR was at the infamous 1958 Cuban Grand Prix in Havana. Juan Manuel Fangio had been kidnapped by Fidel Castro's revolutionaries and the race was marred by a terrible accident. The event was abandoned amidst chaos and Drogo was classified 13th.

0714 was shipped back to Europe and competed in some minor events before being rebuilt and eventually repainted red. Drogo raced the car for the last time at the XII Circuito Internacional Vila Real in Portugal. 0714 was then sold via Luigi Chinetti to Alan Connell of Fort Worth, Texas in November 1958. Piero Drogo was later killed driving his 365 GTC Coupé in 1973. He ran into the back of a truck that had broken down in an unlit tunnel near Bologna. He was 46 years old.

In 1959, prior to campaigning 0714, Connell had the car painted black with a very distinctive red nose, in the same style as his Maserati 250S. Connell raced 0714 extensively across the United States in SCCA National events. At the Pensacola National he was third overall and second in class. Fourth overall and second in class at Virginia International Raceway. Tenth and second in class at Cumberland and at Bridgehampton was seventh and took his first class victory. Another class victory was achieved at the next race at Elkhart Lake, with fifth overall. Buckley, Colorado saw a fourth and second in class, a result repeated at Riverside. At the Riverside Kiwanis GP he was eighth and fourth in class and he finished fourth overall and first in class at Montgomery. Connell easily won the Class D Modified title in 1959 and he often raced the Testarossa at Regional events. He was a very capable driver and took an outright victory at Mansfield, Louisiana.

Eventually this fabulous Testarossa was returned to Chinetti's in New York. The car was rebuilt and sold to Washington, D.C. resident Charlie Hayes. Hayes dropped a valve at the Thompson National in 1960 but finished second in a Regional at Vineland, New Jersey and fifth at Marlboro, Maryland. Hayes had the car repainted white at the end of the season and sold it to Carl Haas in Chicago. It was then purchased by Wayne Burnett who repainted the car red.

Burnett was a journeyman driver and while he competed in nine National events during the 1961/62 seasons his best finish was sixth at the Meadowdale National in 1962. He fared better in the Regionals finishing second at Wilmot Hills, second at Minneapolis, an outright win at Lawrenceville, Illinois, and a third back at Wilmot Hills.In 1962, the original engine 0714 was removed and the dry sump unit from 0770 TR was installed. Disc brakes were added as well as a clear TR59 type carburettor cover. Burnett raced the car six times in 1963, finishing eighth at Elkhart Lake and with Luke Stear co-driving, 12th in the 500-mile race at the same circuit.

The car was eventually acquired by Robert Dusek of Solebury, Pennsylvania in 1970 and was restored back to its original specification and colour, reunited with engine 0714. In 1977 the Testarossa was shown by Dusek at the 14th Annual Ferrari Club of America National meeting at Watkins Glen.

In August 1984 Ferrari 250 Testarossa 0714 was sold to Yoshijuko Hayashi in Japan and in January 1995 was acquired by Yoshiho Matsuda from Tokyo. The same year Matsuda showed the car at Suzuka at the Forza Ferrari meeting. Partnered by Oyaizu, this car competed in the Mille Miglia in 1995 and 1996. Matsuda also drove it at the Monterey historic races at Laguna Seca in 1996.

In 1998 the car was back in action at the Neko Historic Automobile Event at Honda's Twin Ring Motegi Circuit. It competed again the following year. Also in 1999, 0714 was at the tenth anniversary meeting of the Ferrari Club of Japan at Suzuka.In 2004 the car was shown at The Quail in Carmel Valley and displayed at the Ferrari Club of America Laguna Seca track event. More recently 0714 has benefitted from a re-spray back to black and red – the same livery in which the car competed in so many races in the 1950s and 1960s. Furthermore, the car has been overhauled by marque specialists ensuring that it is ready to be enjoyed on rallies or track events in America and Europe.

RM Auctions has had the pleasure of test driving 0714 and confirms that the car performed beautifully. The steering is light and the throttle response is immediate, giving the driver the feeling that the 12-cylinder engine is more than willing to power through the revs to the 8000 rpm redline. The symphony of the powerplant matched with the growl from the megaphone exhausts will make any enthusiast's hair stand on end. The reverse lock-out, four-speed all-synchromesh gearbox is very precise and confidence inspiring. Easier to drive than a Ferrari 250 GTO and perhaps much more rewarding thanks to its more favourable power to weight ratio, 0714 is a truly fantastic racing car. Not only is the performance breathtaking, but the view over the bonnet when driving is simply one of the best in the world.

It is the fourth of about 34 cars produced and the second customer car built. Moreover, it is one of only 21 cars to feature the desirable pontoon fenders and as such is considerably rarer than the famed 250 GTO, of which 36 examples were built. With its Scaglietti bodywork, 0714 is truly stunning – like a great sculpture it begs to be touched. Its incredible racing history puts the car far beyond most other 250 Testarossas, if such a thing can be said. This car would be welcomed with open arms to all the great historic race meetings and events around the globe. As these cars rarely come to market, the Testarossa is one of the most coveted in the marque's history. With breathtaking looks, fantastic performance and handling, this is a true connoisseur's Ferrari.

Thursday, May 14, 2009

Of Montreal's First Time High




I've been really obsessed with the acoustic version of this song lately. It's off of An Elurdian Instance EP (a.k.a. The Jon Brion EP) which was released earlier this year. I think it's better than anything off of Skeletal Lamping, but I'm a crabby old man, still hoisting The Gay Parade as their best work, so heed my words carefully. I've been wrong before.

Monday, May 11, 2009

Eight Things To Do On The Internet (That Aren't Porn)

1. Tiltshift Your Photograph - With the TiltShift Maker you can selectively blur a photograph to simulate a narrow depth of field, making the image appear to be a miniature model. It's a quick cheat to acchieve a rather complex photographic technique involving special lenses. Works best with landscape shots and looks great when time-lapsed on video. It won't make your ass look miniature though, so don't even bother.


2. Bling Out A Picture - There's nothing classier than adding some sparkly bling to a portrait. It's also the best way to show how you feel about someone. Like, say, a funny looking actor, for example. Check out Blingee to make your own. Bonus points if you can make that "making it rain" thing make sense in the context of the picture. 



3. Make A Creepy PhotoFace - This one is guaranteed to creep you out. So much so, that I won't even post it here. Just go check out what I was able to do with my face. Yikes. You should create your own at PhotoFace and send me a copy at lucaeandi(at)gmail(dot)com. It probably won't creep me out more than seeing your regular face, but give it your best shot.

4. Make A Lolcat - So what if cats happen to speak broken English? This just makes their characteristically human observations even more hi-larious. Make your own lolcat at I Can Haz Cheezburger? It better involve Dr. Tinycat, or I ain't looking at it. 



5. Watch YouTube Videos In A New Way - Watching YouTube videos is fun and all, but watching them on drugs is probably not likely to blow your mind, even in full screen. They're just too linear, you know? Well, YooouuuTuuube comes to the rescue. Just enter the URL of your favorite video, get baked and prepare to be taken to a dream world of magic. This one in particular has already taken the web by storm and is likely to make you reevaluate your intake of hallucinogenics. 

6. Play A QWERTY Drum Machine - Use your computer keyboard for something more than just typing your crappy semi-autobiographical novel; make some hot beats with it instead! It's a fun little collection of samples that, if coupled with some audio editing software, could be used as a base for your breakthrough single. Well, probably not, but I bet if you asked him, Lil Wayne would spit a hot 16 on the remix. Put that in your book.  

7. Have A Surreal Conversation With Elizabot - ELIZAbot is a conversation program that mocks a Rogerian psychotherapist. It basically centers around what you say to it and asks general questions based on your replies. Starting with "Please tell me your problem", the conversation can quickly spiral into hilariously surreal territory. I like trying to answer only with questions, like it's a skit off of Whose Line Is It Anyway? and see where it goes. It seems to help me cope when I'm very, very lonely. 

8. Play The Hardest Riddle On The Internet - This one is the ultimate time waster, but a clever one at that. NotPron is an online riddle, puzzle and scavanger hunt all in one. It's pretty ingenius, innovative, and very challenging at times. If you can't make it out of the first few levels, it's probably not for you, but otherwise, enjoy the journey it takes you on. And if you get stuck, there's plenty of online resources to help you cheat. You know, if you don't mind being a filthy cheater and making the baby Jesus cry. 

Now back to work!

Thursday, May 7, 2009

Back By Unpopular Demand, More Album Reviews!

Some new releases and others I missed along the way, as always, rated using my Bazooka system:

The Horrors - Primary Colors

Shoegaze lovingly meets Madchester on this British band's second album. Swirling guitars worthy of Loveless, brooding vocals reminiscent of Unknown Pleasures, and a stellar production job by Portishead's Geoff Barrow. Few bands have borrowed from those influences with as good a result. And it's Trent Reznor approved, apparently.



N.A.S.A. - The Spirit Of Apollo

N.A.S.A. (North America/South America) is a collaboration of American-born producer Squeek E. Clean (a.k.a. Sam Spiegel, a.k.a. Spike Jonze's brother) and Brazilian-born DJ Zegon (a.k.a. Ze Gonzales.) There's so many guests on this album that I don't have enough space to list them all; let's just say they run the gamut from Tom Waits to Likke Li to Ghostface Killah. For the most part, the eclectic mix works, with only a few misteps along the way. Put it on at a hipster birthday party and you'll impress a couple of those little shits (although they'd probably rather die than admit it.)  



Joker's Daughter - The Last Laugh

Another collaboration, this time between English singer/songwriter Helena Costas and superstar producer Danger Mouse. The pairing yields captivating results. It's whimsical folk, vivid in imagery and aurally capricious. Costas' whispers are as haunting as they are beautiful and Danger Mouse's production is right on point. Bonus: Neutral Milk Hotel's Scott Spillane adds his horns to the mix.  


Coconut Records - Davy

This one snuck up on me, I didn't even know it was coming out until the day it was released on iTunes. It's slightly different from Jason Schwartzman's first outing as Coconut Records, 2007's Nighttiming, in that it's pretty heavily influenced by the Beatles. It's poppy, at times even sugary, and at 30 minutes in length, it's a perfect treat to be enjoyed ad nauseam



Mewithoutyou - It's All Crazy! It's All False! It's All A Dream It's Alright

Mewithoutyou started out as a harder edged indie rock group, whose music was propelled by anguished lyrics and clangy electric guitars through their first few albums. With time, they settled into a more focused and less angsty bunch, and accordingly varied their instrumentation beyond the standard rock archetype of guitars/bass/drums. It's All Crazy! is actually largely acoustic and uses more orchestral elements. This complements the lyrical approach, which is more allegorical and fable-like. Eccentric, but rewarding upon repeated listenings.  



The Pains Of Being Pure At Heart - S/T

This album has a lot in common with the Raveonette's last one, Lust Lust Lust, as both bands share a love for The Jesus And The Mary Chain, in all their fuzzed-out pop glory. There's also some undercurrents of Morrissey in the vocal melodies and the mopey lyrical content, but it's not too derivative. Not a bad debut from this New York band who's getting plenty of love in the blogosphere. 



Phoenix - Wolfgang Amadeus Phoenix

Phoenix's fourth album is not much of a departure for the French band, but consistency is the key word here, not monotomy. They've perfected such a great, fun sound that they always come off sounding fresh. I'm not even sure what to call their unique style but ultimately I'm fine with pop, because this is what pop music should be. Dynamic, catchy, and just damn fun.    



Various Artists - Score! 20 Years of Merge Records: The Covers

This compilation commemorates the 20th year of Durham, NC-based label, Merge Records, by getting together an A-list indie rock lineup to cover songs from the label's catalog. There's scores of great artists like Bright Eyes, Broken Social Scene, Ryan Adams, Okkervil River and Les Savy Fav covering songs by other great artists, like Arcade Fire, Superchunk, Neutral Milk Hotel, Lambchop, and The Magnetic Fields, amongst others. One of the greatest American labels, well worthy of praise. Here's hoping for another 20 years of great releases.

Friday, May 1, 2009

Steve Buscemi Is The Best!

Steve Buscemi, this Blingee represents my love for you!
Steve Buscemi Is The Best!
Have I ever mentioned how Steve Buscemi is the best?!

Well, he is.

Few actors have as much range or are as universally respected as Mister Buscemi. He's been in more movies and television shows than anyone else I can think of right this second. And even though he's totally made acting his bitch, it's like, barely a hobby for him. He also writes, directs, and produces!

And that's just the fucking beginning.

Did you know he used to be a New York City fireman from 1980 to 1984? A fucking fireman. Get this, he fucking shows up at his old firehouse the day after 9/11 to volunteer. Just shows up, like, "I'm here, fuckers, give me a shovel." This motherfucker worked twelve hour shifts for a week, digging through rubble with his old comrades. Where were you?

He wasn't getting paid for that shit. He wasn't looking for recognition. He just did it because he's a fucking good guy. Compared to Steve Buscemi, you and I are fucking pathetic. Just useless fucking turds.

And when was the last time you heard anyone say anything bad about Steve Buscemi? It just doesn't happen. No one denies this!

I don't know, man, I'm just proud to live in a world that has Steve Buscemi in it and this is the only way I know how to say it. You should be proud too.

Now do yourself a favor and go rent Airheads. It's fucking great, you know it. Here's a reminder:



I wish Steve Buscemi was in my band. We'd be called The Steve Buscemi Project featuring Steve Buscemi. I wouldn't mind playing second fiddle to him, he's the best.

Tuesday, April 28, 2009

The Opposite Of Food Porn

In a move that suggests that Domino's Pizza is now getting ideas for its menu from This Is Why You're Fat, the delivery chain recently launched a line of Bread Bowl Pastas; which amount to a pile of "fuck you" to people on the Atkins diet (not to mention Italians and their culture.) 

These carb bombs are available in five different flavors and are no doubt delicious for people who believe that The Olive Garden sends its cooks to Tuscany to learn to cook. 

They also completely nullify the Italian concept of scarpetta (literally, "little shoe"), the ritualistic sweeping of the bowl with a crust of bread to pick up the remaining sauce at the bottom. When the bowl IS the bread, scarpetta is practically futile. Thanks again, Domino's.

This latest dumbfounding invention brought to mind another gastronomical monstrosity, concocted by a multinational conglomerate to test the boundaries of good taste:

The KFC Famous Bowls - The Chicken & Biscuit Bowl starts with mashed potatoes, layered with sweet kernel corn and loaded with bite-size pieces of crispy chicken. Then it's topped with homestyle white pepper gravy and sprinkled with a shredded three cheese blend. For the final touch, a buttermilk biscuit is tucked in the side. 

This sensory excercise in flavor distinction is aptly immortalized by Patton Oswalt as "a failure pile in a sadness bowl" in the clip below. 



By the way, I've just learned that Domino's is giving away a free Bread Bowl Pasta from 11AM to 2PM tomorrow at participating stores, so make sure to carb up to the max, on the house! 

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